Audiences


Guidance to prospective audiences, well in advance of their attendance at an event, can be an enlightening educational service, especially when provided as follows:

Persons perceived to have impertinently perfumed themselves, thereby choking or otherwise suffocating half the occupants of this auditorium, will be asked to remove themselves from the venue forthwith.

Good breathing is a necessary occupation here. 

Please do not bring any food items or liquids into the auditorium.  These will be confiscated.

No-one wants to smell your boiled lozenges whilst listening to a sublime aria.  They certainly do not want the experience marred by cellophane wrappers and aggressive rappers.

Neither should items indicating other bad habits be brought here, even if not directly related to the continuation of the dentistry profession.

The smell of tobacco and alcohol are banned in the auditorium just as much as their consumption.  We must all set a good example to the performers.

As previously mentioned, strong perfumes and any other unnecessary scents are banned. 

So are all other unacceptable standards of personal and interpersonal hygiene, respectfulness and attentiveness.

This venue must remain relatively peaceful at all times, for both local and global audiences.